Where are they now?

I've been thinking a lot lately about where we are.  On one level, I believe that we are exactly where we are supposed to be.  People come in and out of our lives, opportunities present themselves, and we make decisions based on whatever influences are dominant in our lives at the time, and the resulting timeline leads us to the next place we are supposed to be.

Free Choice?

If The Creator/God(s) have already laid out this timeline, as some would believe, then those choices really don't matter. You've already made them. Again, no matter what, you are exactly where you are supposed to be. So am I.

So here's the thing. Over the last couple of years, I've had to watch people close to me pass away. Death is a natural process, something we all at some point will face. It's hard to imagine what actually happens to us or our consciousness in that moment. Religion provides most of the answers to the questions we all have about death. I still have some that are unanswered.

I believe in God. I am a deist in that sense. I'm not particularly religious, you know all the rules and ceremonies and such seem to interfere with the whole faith part. (That's probably a separate topic)

Anyway, back on topic. When those close to us, those who are such integral parts of our lives pass on the next phase, where do they go?

They aren't gone. They are still part of our lives. They speak to us, guide us, and even frustrate us still. I believe that our memories and thoughts of them are how we preserve them. The energy our loved ones shared with us in life, we perpetuate after their passing, thus providing their immortality.

I don't have the answers to the question. The question just won't leave my mind:

Where are they now?


Now enjoy a picture of a beautiful new baby.

Haven't posted for a while. I have a shoot next week with a new model that I'm excited about. I'm always a little afraid that I'll let the model down by not shooting them with as much skill as they have talent. It got me going through some old shoots and rethinking them. I found this and thought I'd share it. This is Rebecca Lawrence, a great model, and truly inspirational to work with. She's naked, so I'll post it a little farther down in case you want to leave now.

 

Last of the Greatest Generation

We buried my grandmother yesterday. My Mother's Mother, and last of my grandparents. Kind of weird, losing that whole line of ancestors. It means I move up a position in the line to become the next lost generation. She was 89, and part of the population that helped build our nation. She, like the rest of her peers, began life in poverty. Poverty by today's standards, but relative to the rest of the world, about average for the time. They worked hard all their lives, expecting little more than having their basic needs met, satisfied that they could fulfill their obligations to God, Family and Country.
I wondered, as we listened to the service yesterday, what my grandchildren might think of me and my generation, when it becomes their turn to bury us. It's a solemn duty, burying your ancestors. A duty I was honored to share with my son yesterday. I hope he pauses as I have, to reflect on the passage of one generation to the next, and the legacy each leaves for the next to build on.

Change..in the face of stagnation....

..or maybe it's the other way around. I'm not sure. While I can tell that big changes are occurring both inside and around me, I feel kind of stagnant. Maybe blocked is a better word. It's been a few years since I've had a "real" job, and while I'm thankful for a steady paycheck, I miss being able to take advantage of those brief moments of creative inspiration. I know as time moves along, I'll find a rhythm, and get back on my creative feet. Until then, I'll leave you with an image from a couple years ago. I feel like this vessel, waiting for the sun to shine again and get back underway.

 

Knock, Knock. Who's There? The NCDOT!

    I catch some flack from my more liberal friends when I complain that the Government has become too big. Too invasive. Too wasteful. It seems there's no money in the state budget for things like textbooks, art education, or mental health care. Well, don't tell the Department of Transportation. They seem to have plenty. While most of us struggle to make the mortgage, they have a truck with four guys sticking orange signs up on the sidewalk, only to come back around an hour later, same four guys, same three in the truck same ONE removing said signs. There also seems to be plenty of funding to widen a road that never seemed too narrow to begin with.
    About two years ago, our neighbors completely gutted and remodeled their house. Last week the NCDOT hauled it away in dumpsters. It kinda went like this:

First you get a letter saying: "Thanks for taking care of our property, now get out, we're coming to tear it down."

Then they bring in a large piece of equipment.

 Then you watch 15 years of hard work and sacrifice get put into a dumpster and hauled away.

No big deal, really.

Most folks just go on about their day.

Now some of these road projects are needed. I-40/I-77 interchange. I-40/Hwy21 interchange. But the project at Exit 50, East Broad seems to be a huge waste of money. Enough money will be spent on this project to put plenty of textbooks, plenty of teachers, plenty of mental health resources in the hands of those who need it. Make no mistake. We are taxed plenty. The problem is Raleigh's politically misguided use of the funds already in their possession.

Stepping off the soap box..for now.

What a week!

    First of all, let me just say how much I enjoy life; just being alive every day is a blessing. The arc of the sun across the sky, the daily art exhibition from the supreme architect. To experience creation is to experience life. Being a creation, and passing the act along does a great service to our creator.

    Much has been written about receiving blessings from the universe. Knock and the door shall be opened, Ask and you shall receive, etc.. the trick is avoiding the powerfully creative weapon our minds are. If we get too focused on the wanting, then that is exactly what we create. Want. "I want this, I want that". Want is exactly what we create.

    Sometimes we have to let go of the thing that's holding us back, redefine our true passion, and wait for an answer. When the door opens, then we have the choice to walk through or not. Getting out of our mind and following the heart is difficult. From the day we're born, the world tries to break us of the habit. Stay in line, don't make a fuss, if you're happy, you must be doing it wrong. I say Bullshit! What if our only obligation is to the one who created us, and his instructions include enjoying this beautiful experience which has been so conveniently placed before us.

    When my time here comes to an end, I know there will be a final conscious thought. I don't think it'll be "Man, I wish I'd been more obedient", or "I may have been a bit too happy". I plan for it to be " Man, that was fun; Let's do it again!"

The picture for today's post is me, and two other happy people, engaged in the joyous act of creation. Thanks Katy, Rob, Karen, Bob, and all the other folks in my life who allow me to create.

A case for lo-tech.

    I was having a conversation this week about film photography versus digital. Actually, in my world, it's an ongoing conversation. The point of this particular "thread" was that, as digital photographers, we've become lazy. At first, I was defensive. I started in film, I understand the basics, digital just enhances the workflow, etc.. Another photographer, a while back, who also started in film, but now shoots all digital, dared us to shoot one session a week with the LCD display covered up on our cameras; the way we used to shoot film. At first, I thought is was a stupid idea, but have come to realize how smart it is. 

    The point is technology does make us lazy. Worse than that, it may actually be causing parts of our brain to de-volve. Nature is very efficient, and if something is not being used, she'll find some other use for it. I'm not going back to film, but I might just shoot some images with the back of my camera covered up, just to keep that part of my brain from withering away. I simply can't afford to lose any more of it.

   So, anyway, the image. One of my grandfathers probably forged this right there on the farm. It served exactly the function for which it was intended, no more, no less. Very efficient. three generations later, it waits, still ready to perform. It never needed any additional energy, it never had a software malfunction, and it didn't even have an owner's manual. Yet, it will outlive it's creator, but not it's purpose.